I have reached my goal for January and still have part of a day left. I sold 80 books in December on Amazon and hoped to sell 100 in January - I did - plus the one to Spain (which is really weird). I am going to set my goal in February to 100 because it is a short month, but you never know. Some people are selling 100 a day or even a 1,000 a day; but those are novels that have to do with vampires or romance.
Actually, I found out that 100 a month is pretty good for most ebooks and for humor it is excellent, since everyone's taste is different and what I think is funny is probably not to most others.
I entered some of my books in the Global ebook awards thing - cost me $79, but you also get some instructions on how to promote your books. So far I have been lazy and have not been doing that. I am hoping I can get a couple of good reviews from the judges even if I don't win the "coveted gold sticker" for the cover of the book. I still haven't figured out how the sticker would be applied to the cover if it is an ebook... ha ha.
I wish a few of the people who bought my books would go back and write a review on the book page because that helps sales, but so far nothing yet. This is why I spent the $79 so that maybe a judge will write one (hopefully positive and not too critical).
Anyway, that is my news for the day.
Tah tah
Tuesday, January 31, 2012
Friday, January 13, 2012
Reviews
I am hoping that putting a link in the back of the books to my author page will make it easier for readers to review the book, but so far either the buyers have not read the book or just don't like to write reviews.
Sales are moving along at a slow steady pace, so I am very thankful for that; it means that there are people out there who like to laugh.
I have a recommendation for a really funny novel that comes from another Pacific Northwest Author: David Moore; Title: David & Suzanne's Big Frickin' Canadian Motorcycle Adventure. It is available in paperback for $14.95 and is currently free on Kindle. I do not know how long that will last, so get your copy ASAP.
Enjoy the read!!!
Sales are moving along at a slow steady pace, so I am very thankful for that; it means that there are people out there who like to laugh.
I have a recommendation for a really funny novel that comes from another Pacific Northwest Author: David Moore; Title: David & Suzanne's Big Frickin' Canadian Motorcycle Adventure. It is available in paperback for $14.95 and is currently free on Kindle. I do not know how long that will last, so get your copy ASAP.
Enjoy the read!!!
Tuesday, January 3, 2012
New Book Covers
I am in the process of changing my Funny Stories book covers from the Party Pig to the Laughing Tiger. Hopefully it will help book sales on Amazon. Not sure if I will change the covers on Smashwords, they take forever to republish, but I might do it in a couple of weeks. Here is what the new cover looks like. I have also posted links to the books and my author page at the end of each book for the convenience of the kindle owners. 
Saturday, October 29, 2011
More News
I have been readinging several novellas and am behind on writing reviews, but will get them done this week. I highly recommend "Rabbits in the Garden" by Jessica McHugh, "Farsighted" by Emlyn Chand, and "If Tombstones Could Talk" by Stacey Joy Netzel. I have several others I am reading and will recommend later. If you want to read a really different humor novel, I recommend "Echo Station One" by Edwin Stark. I did not think I would like it because it is not the type of humor I normally read, but it held my interest and, to my surprise, was really a good read.
Of course since I am reading, I am not writing so my teen novel is just sitting on my computer, patiently waiting for me to do something with it. Promising myself I will get back to it after the holidays and then will write like a crazy woman!
Of course since I am reading, I am not writing so my teen novel is just sitting on my computer, patiently waiting for me to do something with it. Promising myself I will get back to it after the holidays and then will write like a crazy woman!
Sunday, October 23, 2011
New News
I finally figured out how to add an RSS feed; however, I don't usually blog so I am not sure of the point of all of this.
I have published several books on Smashwords now and they should go out for sale on Nook and other places within two or three weeks. I have the same books for sale on Amazon Kindle, and now have an author page there.
I have almost enough stories to publish a 7th Twenty Funny Stories book and really wish I would spend more time on my teen novel, but that I will work on that after Christmas if not before!
I have published several books on Smashwords now and they should go out for sale on Nook and other places within two or three weeks. I have the same books for sale on Amazon Kindle, and now have an author page there.
I have almost enough stories to publish a 7th Twenty Funny Stories book and really wish I would spend more time on my teen novel, but that I will work on that after Christmas if not before!
Sunday, September 25, 2011
Baking Cookies
Not all Moms and Grandmas bake, I decided to try; how hard can it be?
I had a package of cookie dough in the bottom of my fridge for awhile; you know the kind you break off the little squares and bake in the oven. I kept them there to bake some quick cookies when the children complained that there was nothing to eat. The children grew up and moved out; they had kids and the cookie package was still there. I found them while cleaning the fridge and am pretty sure it had been there for some ten to fifteen years; so I thought, “Maybe I should do the mommy/housewife thing and bake cookies.”
Take my advice, if you find yourself in the same boat - put the package in the garbage - but I came from the “waste not, want not” generation. I sprayed Pam on the cookie sheet, placed the little squares all around and put them in the oven for 10 minutes. Nothing was happening, so I checked to see if my oven was on - it was; another four minutes and I was beginning to smell the Pam baking, but there was no cookie smell. OK, I took them out of the oven and smashed each square down with the back of a teaspoon then put them back in the oven for another 4 minutes. They have got to be done after 18 minutes, so I decided to take them out of the oven to cool.
You know how good a warm chocolate chip cookie tastes when it comes out of the oven - these did not. There was no smell or flavor, just a little flavorless crunch. I let them sit and cool (maybe they will get better). They became flavorless rocks; but at least now there was no weird aftertaste. Hubby told me to give them to the pig, but I thought it might make him sick (chocolate is not good for animals). I told Hubby that he needed to try one and let me know what he thought. He declined, but I am going to let them sit on the counter for the evening to see if he is tempted; after all, I ate two and did not die.
There are two more cookie-dough rolls in the fridge but I am pretty sure they have been in there longer than the package that was baked, and am thinking they will find their way to the garbage can. I really wanted to make a roll of Pillsbury cinnamon rolls, but that can exploded last month and I had to discard them as well. I guess I will just snack on some Cheerios (right after I check the expiration date on the box).
I had a package of cookie dough in the bottom of my fridge for awhile; you know the kind you break off the little squares and bake in the oven. I kept them there to bake some quick cookies when the children complained that there was nothing to eat. The children grew up and moved out; they had kids and the cookie package was still there. I found them while cleaning the fridge and am pretty sure it had been there for some ten to fifteen years; so I thought, “Maybe I should do the mommy/housewife thing and bake cookies.”
Take my advice, if you find yourself in the same boat - put the package in the garbage - but I came from the “waste not, want not” generation. I sprayed Pam on the cookie sheet, placed the little squares all around and put them in the oven for 10 minutes. Nothing was happening, so I checked to see if my oven was on - it was; another four minutes and I was beginning to smell the Pam baking, but there was no cookie smell. OK, I took them out of the oven and smashed each square down with the back of a teaspoon then put them back in the oven for another 4 minutes. They have got to be done after 18 minutes, so I decided to take them out of the oven to cool.
You know how good a warm chocolate chip cookie tastes when it comes out of the oven - these did not. There was no smell or flavor, just a little flavorless crunch. I let them sit and cool (maybe they will get better). They became flavorless rocks; but at least now there was no weird aftertaste. Hubby told me to give them to the pig, but I thought it might make him sick (chocolate is not good for animals). I told Hubby that he needed to try one and let me know what he thought. He declined, but I am going to let them sit on the counter for the evening to see if he is tempted; after all, I ate two and did not die.
There are two more cookie-dough rolls in the fridge but I am pretty sure they have been in there longer than the package that was baked, and am thinking they will find their way to the garbage can. I really wanted to make a roll of Pillsbury cinnamon rolls, but that can exploded last month and I had to discard them as well. I guess I will just snack on some Cheerios (right after I check the expiration date on the box).
Men & Grocery Shopping
In all our 41 years of marriage my husband has gone grocery shopping with me twice until he retired. This is because I banned him from the stores. He picked up expensive cheeses and other items and then freaked out because the bill was so high; somehow he could not fathom that the rest of the family needed to eat too.
He has been retired for almost a year now and one of his “fun” things is to drive to the next town where the only Safeway store in the county is located. He cannot buy one of something, but buys at least six so he goes alone because I am not a shop-together kind of a person. Being a man’s man, he loves steaks, but only rib bone-in and (he says) Safeway has the best, so whenever they are on sale off he goes to buy a half dozen family packs for me to freeze in single-steak packages (he is the only one that eats them).
The only other store he is allowed to go to is the Dollar Store where he buys reading glasses. He comes home with a half dozen pair in all colors and sizes. He used to buy other things in the dollar store like pickled cauliflower, but being that he did not have his glasses on he would get six jars of unknown pickle types thinking he made a big score in the pickled cauliflower isle. I have shelves of pickles that no one will touch. The new rule is “Do not buy anything without your glasses.”
Another week, another sale and back to Safeway he goes. He is always so pleased when he comes home and goes on and on how friendly everyone is to him. Finally, Mr. Hermit is coming out of his shell, maybe we will actually go out to dinner sometime soon (it has been four years). Since we both forgot our anniversary this year, we have another 364 days to wait for date-night.
After Safeway and the Dollar Store, can you imagine what would happen if he went into a hardware store? Six hammers, I don’t think so. This is why I am the one that does all the rest of the shopping, even at the hardware store.
Of course it is not just the stores, it is garage sales and “side of the road bargains” that are a pox to his wallet. For awhile he was coming home with broken riding lawnmowers. At one point we had six, but my son took one home, two are for parts and the other three we mow lawn with or just use them for transportation around the yard (easier than walking). His latest acquisition, 6 top-hats with monopoly pieces glued to them. Maybe I should give up and let him buy the fancy cheese.
He has been retired for almost a year now and one of his “fun” things is to drive to the next town where the only Safeway store in the county is located. He cannot buy one of something, but buys at least six so he goes alone because I am not a shop-together kind of a person. Being a man’s man, he loves steaks, but only rib bone-in and (he says) Safeway has the best, so whenever they are on sale off he goes to buy a half dozen family packs for me to freeze in single-steak packages (he is the only one that eats them).
The only other store he is allowed to go to is the Dollar Store where he buys reading glasses. He comes home with a half dozen pair in all colors and sizes. He used to buy other things in the dollar store like pickled cauliflower, but being that he did not have his glasses on he would get six jars of unknown pickle types thinking he made a big score in the pickled cauliflower isle. I have shelves of pickles that no one will touch. The new rule is “Do not buy anything without your glasses.”
Another week, another sale and back to Safeway he goes. He is always so pleased when he comes home and goes on and on how friendly everyone is to him. Finally, Mr. Hermit is coming out of his shell, maybe we will actually go out to dinner sometime soon (it has been four years). Since we both forgot our anniversary this year, we have another 364 days to wait for date-night.
After Safeway and the Dollar Store, can you imagine what would happen if he went into a hardware store? Six hammers, I don’t think so. This is why I am the one that does all the rest of the shopping, even at the hardware store.
Of course it is not just the stores, it is garage sales and “side of the road bargains” that are a pox to his wallet. For awhile he was coming home with broken riding lawnmowers. At one point we had six, but my son took one home, two are for parts and the other three we mow lawn with or just use them for transportation around the yard (easier than walking). His latest acquisition, 6 top-hats with monopoly pieces glued to them. Maybe I should give up and let him buy the fancy cheese.
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